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Missing Dad

It was one year ago from this day when my Dad passed away in his sleep. Those days, I ran as much as I could to deal with the pain—and also to celebrate his life.

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Memories of him started flooding back the past few days. He worried a lot about my running. I still remember how, after each Sunday race, he would tell me “Running is bad for your knees.” and I would nod my head, but laugh it off in my head. There was no point in arguing with Dad.  And, seeing how much weight I had lost, he would always remind me to eat more; sometimes, he would even drop more food unto my plate.  Despite his concerns, he knew me well enough to know that he couldn’t stop me from pursuing my passions—whether it was art, choice of career, or running.  This man knew he had a bull for a daughter, yet he gave her wings to fly.

So many memories, so many days since I last saw him.  I miss him terribly.  

Today, I woke up in desperate need of a run.  But, plan was for the gym in the morning and the rest of the day with the family to hear mass and visit Dad at the cemetery.  I’ll have to wait till Sunday for my long run. A slow and easy 25km for Dad.  A run to relieve the pain of missing him, to tell him he is always in my thoughts and prayers, and to honor and celebrate his life.

Posted on 10.30.09 to 01 Bullish Insights. Subscribe to follow comments on this post. 9 comments. Add your thoughts or trackback from your own site.

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9 Responses to “Missing Dad”

  1. Oo nga pala, Oct. 30. It’s been a year na pala.

    For what it’s worth, your dad’s greatest legacy is his passing on (inadvertently) his own traits to you. Your obstinacy, your persistence, and your resilience… based on your kwentos, ay naku, you are your father’s daughter. :)

    Happy long weekend woman haha

    Marga said on Oct 31 09 at 12:25 AM Reply

  2. I’m sure you love your Dad so much ms Jamie, have you ever experience dreaming about your dad and waking up crying? That feeling na sobrang sarap umiyak and you’re missing that person so much?

    cardinalfire said on Oct 31 09 at 3:23 AM Reply

  3. Your dad died on the same day Jam’s dad passed-but his dad died 20 yrs ago na. I remember reading your post running in HK during this sad time. I’m sure he’s proud of his bullheaded daughter.

    Mayi said on Oct 31 09 at 11:35 AM Reply

  4. 1 year already? gosh. well, best way to honor his life is to live yours well, which you do. so here’s to remembering and honoring our daddies today :)

    krie said on Nov 01 09 at 11:45 AM Reply

  5. that was indeed very touching! thanks for sharing miss bull runner.

    onerazan said on Nov 02 09 at 10:48 AM Reply

  6. Inspiring. Thanks for sharing.

    reylynne said on Nov 03 09 at 9:14 PM Reply

  7. made my eyes water. I’m sure your dad is happy knowing you continue doing everything that revs your passion.

    my own dad is also concerned about my own runs (mostly safety for all the early race mornings), but I know that underneath all that worry, he’s happy I found another thing to be so excited about.

    shing said on Nov 06 09 at 10:27 AM Reply

  8. very heartwarming thanks for sharing this jaymie

    mie said on Nov 06 09 at 4:01 PM Reply

  9. Hi, Ma’am. I can really connect with this. I am crying now while writing. I also miss my parents… both of them really badly. My mother died three months ago, on her birthday. 11 months before that, my father decied to climb his stairway to heaven. Same case with your dad, while sleeping. Now I am on my own since my brother is working overseas. A sad year for me.

    Flashing back my first run, my mother was so happy that I have something for her. A bag of goodies from Rob. Supermarket’s buddy run. A simple thing like that made her smile. Now that they are not here physically, i know that they are always on my back to support what i like. And literally, i have their portrait on my back with Christ on the center. Everytime I run, I give a pat on my back knowing that they are on me all the time.

    It’s hard… but running overcomes my infinite sadness. And of course, PRAYERS.

    Mem’ries keep love alive, mem’ries will never die.

    -pat-

    Patrick de Guzman said on Dec 02 09 at 12:32 AM Reply

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